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The names used in this poem are all fictitious and if situation(s) described thereinrelates directly to anyone you know bearing the same name(s), it is strictly coincidental.

As such, the writer reserves the right to create his own characters, plot and setting as he sees fitting for use in this instalment of LUCIAN CHRONICLES and stresses on the fact that the events describe in this piece of writing are purposed to sensitize persons on the collective happenings in his country. The characters are not real people.

Zafe` Moun by Stephen A. Dantes

Girlllllll, you eh hear how da church pastor
get a bottin? Bon doos!
Sister Pam talk how much bout dat aready
An she wasn’t even a virgin
Choops!
Let her come and tell me anyfing
Those hypocrites
Pastor almost go mad ee
Poor jab

Bongo, you know him?
Dat ras from dong de road
Same one dat say he how conscious and ting
Da man self self,
We catch him wif a whole pan a chicken
An Blanc, dat vo’le` from behind Ma Paul house
Is he dat put a ham he steal from Fada Josie
In da ras fridge
Look soaps!

 

But, you know Josie had rape a likkle boy?
Dat priest make me do my first communion girl
I know da man had like boys,
But wa
He was looking at my likkle
Brother how strange
He does give his losty to all dem ole women
Ma Forsay and Jones
Have a basket full under deh bed

Da Jones self, self,
She take his losty and go and do gajé
Dey get her by Vigie cemetery a night
But she was looking like a animal
Mésyé!
Woyyyy
Everybody ran
When dey see her

 

Straight to Fatso house
Yes, at fat-bastard house
Da same one dat does blésé his wife
Everyday de man beating da girl
And she so stupid,
When police come
She pretending like de man doh do it especially
Or intentionally

When she die she go end up like
Da lady dat horn her man
In de bush behind da ole mango tree
In Gregory yard
Uh huh.
Yea Gregory,
Da short boog dat does walk like so

 

Ay ay,
You remember his brother Boyzie
Had kill himself?
You doh remember dat?
Mésyé, where you does live?
You jus com dong?
But anyway, it was on news
Da same week Mal-ka-di had still
Money from da Credit Union
You still doh remember?

Ok, ok.
So you eh hear de principal of
Dat school dong da road have A.I.D.S?
Dat all over garcon, you eh hear dat?
Choops.
Where you from?
Come close lemme tell you a secret
One fing, doh go and say dat I say eh
Bon!

 

Cause when dey come an say
You say dat I say
What all of dem not saying,
Is me an you
So just watch your mouth

So da minister daughter sleep with a kinda men
She does take people man too ee
And you know she was about to get married eh
But de man leave her when he find out
She horning him
And now she with somebody husband

 

But Marco self is a majshee
Because his woman horn him how much wee
And she get pregnant with a next man child
Ha ha ha
Dey give him a bottin too!

Oh yeah,
Sharon does go to town every Saturday,
But dat not her clothes

You know dey had tell me Shian had like you
You never hear dat?
I know you is a woman,
But dey say she does rub, a zanmyèz

 

Anyway, I fink I smell my pan burning
Lemme go and check my man food eh
Before he reach from work
We will talk tomorrow sister,
God bless you eh,
Ba bye

 

Poem rated 5.0 stars by 48 people

 

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COMMENTS CLOSED

Stacy (September 15th 2010): Well well….I can’t stop laughing….excellent over magnificent!! Keep them coming!!!

Ally (September 9th 2010): love it…. love it…. you got jokes ahhhhhhhh,,,,,

Vana Sonson (July 17th 2010): one things for sure you captured the real taste of st.lucian gossiping especially the “don’t tell anyone that i’m the one who told you or else” very enjoyable keep it up

Kewrina (July 4th 2010): Lmaooooooooooo woooye dem lucians uh lmaooo awwa sht fonni

Kay Sweet (July 4th 2010): Lmaoooooo dat was maddddddddd!!!! Wooye Lucians again!!! WELL DONE!!!!!!!!!!!

Hermaine J (July 3rd 2010): lol very funny indeed. good job!

Cookiesue Sweetz (July 1st 2010): lol lol haha this is soooo funny and so typical of St. Lucians … u have them right boy lol good stuff

Donalie Charlemagne (July 1st 2010): Son you just booked your ticket straight to hell! lol lol lol lol lol …Great  piece  Dantes.—and by the way i tellin Shian!

Lisa Jordan (June 30th 2010): great one love  it u have lucians to the [t] have me woundering if u in zefe moun too lol keep doin what u love can stop laughing  that bad

Donathan Leon (June 30th 2010): LOL.. Yes boy thats how they are for true. Zafe Moun. all the way. they even forgetting what they were doing. Nice one Stephen. 🙂

Soraya St. Jules (June 30th 2010): abeh bor.lolol lol lol.real lucian talk.thumbs up 2 dat.zafe moun uh core

Elenora Elford (June 29th 2010): lmao. ha ha ha. for true das really how lucian ppl does min ppl biznis ee. an wen dey start talkin so dey jus go from one person to d nex without even noticing. lol. ha ha Stephen u kill it ee. forget ryhming an ting, poems come in all shapes an forms an da one is d killa yet.

Suanne Mc Kenzie (June 29th 2010): lol lol dat bad i love it i still cya stop laughin n i waitin 4 da rest eh.

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